A Walk

There's a path in the woods that a lot of people know about, but not a lot of people travel. I used to walk it all the time when I was a kid and I've been revisiting it a lot since I came back to MA. I went there late today to find something. As I started along the path the sun was going down. I knew it would get very dark very soon, but I kept going. I started to think about the past year and a half or so. About the people I've seen, associated with, been close to, fell away from, disassociated with, pissed off, alienated, hurt, been hurt by. I pretty much covered all of them. The sun was disappearing quickly. I could see rays of light through the trees. The dead leaves looked like stained glass in front of the setting sun. I heard echoes of voices that had spoken to me over the past year and a half or so. Statements and questions, lies and truths, compliments and insults. I resurrected feelings of disappointment, regret, fear, happiness, anger, sadness, excitement, joy, anxiety, pain, pleasure, calm, love, hate, distaste, jealousy. I kept walking and the light kept fading. The limbs of the trees started to look like arms trying to reach out and grab me. If one of them had, I would have let it. It was getting very cold. Just before the last of the light faded I found what I was looking for. A box. I lifted it but did not open it. It was heavier than it looked. I reached into the right pocket of my jacket and took out the matches and the lighter fluid I had taken from my house. I dug a small hole in the dirt, placed the box into the hole and emptied the lighter fluid onto the box. I stood up and looked at the box for a moment. I let out a sigh, lit the book of matches and dropped it into the hole. There was a whooshing sound as the box ignited. I watched it burn, basking in the light and feeling the warmth of the flames. I stood in the sphere of light, a bright spot in the darkness. The fire burned down and eventually went out. I covered the ashes and filled the hole with dirt. It was completely dark, quiet and cold. I turned and walked back down the path, enjoying a pleasant sense of calm.